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2000 Years of Christmas: An ode to a season most hectic
Posted by R. Wesley Lovil, Dec 11, 2011. 3977 views. ID = 5235

2000 Years of Christmas

Posted by R. Wesley Lovil, Dec 11, 2011. 3977 views. ID = 5235
This post was written in 15 minutes.
The reason for Christmas will not be forgotten
This post has been awarded 27 stars by 7 readers.

It's the season of fun and it's time for joy
All the children dream about some special toy
It started long ago in a town that was small
Where God gave us his son most precious of all
It's Christmas and winter its snow and no school
Yes of all of the months December's a jewel

There's so much to achieve in this busy season
Sometimes we forget to remember the reason
Enjoy your friends, your gifts, your Christmas tree
It's a time of excitement I think most would agree
Though your schedule's hectic take time to recall
Yes the reason you're happy is for God's gift to us all

The kids say they can't sleep they're far too excited
They are wishing for gifts that will make them delighted
While mom hurries to wrap dad worries about bills
But then he thinks of shepards seeing a star in the hills
Of a baby, born in a manger yet more royal than a king
Of wisemen from afar and the gifts they did bring.


Refrain:

There's toys for the boys, a new phone for Joan
We'll have pies and cakes so don't you be late
It's the time for Christmas so let's celebrate
The gift that God gave us, the best ever known






Copyright 2011 R. Wesley Lovil. All rights reserved. FifteenMinutesOfFiction.com has been granted non-exclusive rights to display this work. For permission to reprint this item, please contact the author.
 


   
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This post has been awarded 27 stars by 7 readers.
This post is part of a writing prompt: Christmas Carol

Comments


Douglas
Dec 11, 2011
Aside from enjoying the topic of the carol, I really enjoyed the way you did some of the rhyming, especially some of those "surprise" rhymes within the lines, like:

hurries/worries
toys/boys
phone/Joan (which also pays off at the end, rhyming with known)

and the slant rhyme between cakes and late, which is also a rhyme with celebrate.
   ~Posted by Douglas, Dec 11, 2011

CdnGhost
Dec 13, 2011
Regretably, my comments are somewhat negative.

December 25th has become universally accepted as the day of celebration of the birth of Jesus of Nazareth only since the introduction of the Gregorian Calendar and only within the last 300 years.

By working known facts backwards through time, Jesus is generally accepted to have been born on March 14, 4 BC.

That aside, your poem is well done. Poetry is confined to a rhyme and a meter and in the following two lines, you've added an extra beat:

Firstly,
"It's a time of excitement I think most would agree"
By removing the extra beat, the line becomes:
"It's a time of excitement, I think you'd agree"

And secondly,
"Yes the reason you're happy is for God's gift to us all"
Again, removing the extra beat, the line becomes:
"The reason you're happy is for God's gift to us all."

Again, on the whole, a well written piece of prose.
   ~Posted by CdnGhost, Dec 13, 2011



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