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Santa's OSHA Troubles
Posted by Michael K, Dec 10, 2007. 182 views. ID = 392
This post was written in 15 minutes.
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 | Yes, I really did research the policies. :) |  | This post has been awarded 13 stars by 3 readers. |  | This post is Part 2 of a writing series titled Santa's Bureaucratic Troubles. |
Dear Mr. Claus,
My name is Stan Dard, and I am an OSHA (Occupational Safety & Health Administration) inspector. We recently received an anonymous tip regarding the working conditions at your Toy Factory. According to our anonymous source, the doors in your North Pole facility are only four feet tall.
Unfortunately, this violates our design and construction requirements for exit routes. According to our policies, all exit routes must include a door which is 7 feet six inches (2.3 meters) tall and 28 inches (71.1 centimeters) wide.
We believe your facility is in violation of these requirements. Accordingly, I will be on the next North Pole Express flight, to visit your factory.
Sincerely,
Stan Dard
OSHA Inspector
Dear Mr. Dard,
Thank you for your kind letter. I have been reviewing OSHA standards, and have discovered something which deeply troubles me. According to your regulations, stairway handrails must be at least 36 inches above the tread of the stairs.
My elves would never be able to reach a railing that high.
These building and construction regulations appear to be discriminatory toward my elves, and my lawyers will be in touch with you soon.
Merry Christmas,
Santa Claus
Claus Enterprises CEO
Copyright 2007 Michael K. All rights reserved. FifteenMinutesOfFiction.com has been granted non-exclusive rights to display this work. For permission to reprint this item, please contact the author.
Comments
Josiah T.
Dec 10, 2007 | Oh that's great! Better than the first one! :-)
~Posted by Josiah T., Dec 10, 2007 |
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