Fifteen Minutes Of Fiction Writing Gallery

Pennies: The first line came to me, so I wrote a little more
Posted by Laura, Jul 26, 2008. 2081 views. ID = 1512

Pennies

Posted by Laura, Jul 26, 2008. 2081 views. ID = 1512
This post was written in 4 minutes.
I suppose the last two lines got me thinking of a certain Langston Hughes poem...
This post has been awarded 61 stars by 14 readers.

I could live on pennies
if my thoughts could buy me bread.
And I could dream for days on end
if that would keep me fed.
But hands are far more practical
than wishes ever were.
If daily needs are to be met,
some dreams must stay deferred.

Copyright 2008 Laura. All rights reserved. FifteenMinutesOfFiction.com has been granted non-exclusive rights to display this work. For permission to reprint this item, please contact the author.
 


   
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This post has been awarded 61 stars by 14 readers.
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Comments


Douglas
Jul 27, 2008
I really like this poem (which is why it ended up in the featured gallery) :) But I did puzzle over a couple word choices...

I wondered about the word "studious", and I also wondered about "daily work is to be met", and wondered if what you meant was "daily needs are to be met"?
   ~Posted by Douglas, Jul 27, 2008

Laura
Jul 29, 2008
Hmm, thanks for bringing that up... I suppose the point isn't that mental exertion is any less studious than physical. I'll think about that one... maybe "tangible" is what I'm looking for.
I think I was going for something like a work tally or "quota" in the second-to-last line - some sort of expectation, although it seems that phrasing isn't quite getting that across either.
   ~Posted by Laura, Jul 29, 2008

clayman
Aug 7, 2008
Maybe "productive" rather than "studious"
   ~Posted by clayman, Aug 7, 2008



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