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Letter To Santa Claus: The petty requests of a teenager-like female who bears absolutely no resemblance at all to me...
Posted by Laura, Dec 13, 2007. 1804 views. ID = 420

Letter To Santa Claus

Posted by Laura, Dec 13, 2007. 1804 views. ID = 420
This post was written in 16 minutes.
This post has been awarded 26 stars by 8 readers.

Dear Santa,

Fear not, good Mr. Claus! I will not be wasting your time requesting any specific Orlando Bloom poses on my posters this year, nor will I bemoan the fact that you didn't give me elf ears last Christmas. I'm not even going to ask to find Josh Groban under the tree!

I know exactly what I want for Christmas this year. It came to pass not all that long ago actually, that I looked at myself and came to a grand revelation: I'm not getting enough fat in my diet. Sure, I overdose on the Ben & Jerry's every now and then. Well, every week. And some of my clothes have been mysteriously shrinking lately, but I have a feeling that the dryer setting was just a little too high.


Never mind all the pizza either. I mean, that's healthy! Bread, dairy, vegetables and meat - nearly all of the food groups represented on one handy slice. So that hasn't been helping either. And there has indeed been a lot of free food available during the holiday season, which I have more than sparsely partaken of, but even then, I feel as though this one essential nutrient has been missing from my extremely healthy food itinerary as of late: Chocolate.

I feel that this one delicacy would immediately begin to make drastic improvements in my style of living. For one thing, it would be a wonderful source of calcium. Can't have me developing osteoporosis at an early age now, can we? Dark chocolate is also a wonderful source of antioxidants, which help to neutralize free radicals in my body. So not only is it calcium-rich, it's also Republican!

And must I mention the smooth, rich, buttery flavor that helps with pretty much any trial I am presented with (such as not receiving Josh Groban for Christmas)? I think you get the picture, Santa, old pal. If you could sent a few wheelbarrowfuls of that stuff my way this year, it would be much appreciated. And... maybe a larger wardrobe while you're at it.


Copyright 2007 Laura. All rights reserved. FifteenMinutesOfFiction.com has been granted non-exclusive rights to display this work. For permission to reprint this item, please contact the author.
 


   
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This post has been awarded 26 stars by 8 readers.
This post is part of a writing prompt: Letter To Santa Claus

Comments


Douglas
Dec 13, 2007
requesting any specific Orlando Bloom poses on my posters this year

*snickers*

Ha ha...I laughed out loud at the "republican" bit. :)
   ~Posted by Douglas, Dec 13, 2007

Katie
Dec 14, 2007
LOL!!! This is excellent!!! :-D
   ~Posted by Katie, Dec 14, 2007

Sylavash
Jan 19, 2008
LOL great letter
   ~Posted by Sylavash, Jan 19, 2008



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