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The End of Chocolate
Posted by Douglas, Feb 16, 2009. 1041 views. ID = 2350
This post was written in 12 minutes.
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 | This is just plain silly. |  | This post has been awarded 16 stars by 4 readers. |
Snickers bars, Milky Way, Whatchamacallits, and Chunky bars, lend me your ears! Here we are at the cusp, the precipice, of history. We stand here today because we know, beyond all certainty, that we, with our delicious sugary goodness, are soon to be the downfall of the human race! Yes, that's right. As long as we exist, the only prospects humanity can look forward to are a terrible species-wide diabetic coma and eventual extinction.
Before the end, let me give you one last pep talk. You, my friends, have the courage, the bravery, the foresight, and the self-sacrificial goodness to do what is required. You are the greatest heroes of planet Earth. Future generations of humans will cheer your magnanimous actions for all millennia!
And so, my friends, for the good of all, it is time for us to do what they cannot do! On the count of three, let us cry out our final cheer and launch ourselves from this precipice to drown in the depths of the sea!
One...
Two...
Three...
LIFE IS SWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET...
Copyright 2009 Douglas. All rights reserved. FifteenMinutesOfFiction.com has been granted non-exclusive rights to display this work. For permission to reprint this item, please contact the author.
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