Writing Resources from Fifteen Minutes of Fiction
The following is a piece of writing submitted by Douglas on December 29, 2008
"Some of you know that I'm hoping to start a nationwide trend of responding to scammy cold calls by asking to order a large pepperoni pizza.
The results are sometimes amusing. Plus, while I'm on hold, I can catch up on reading stuff at FMOF! :)"
The results are sometimes amusing. Plus, while I'm on hold, I can catch up on reading stuff at FMOF! :)"
Pepperoni Pizza
Press one if you would like to lower your interest rates now. Beep. Thank you. Please hold for the next available operator.Hello. You have pressed one to lower your interest rates now?
Hi. I'd like to order a large pepperoni pizza, please.
Excuse me?
Pepperoni pizza. I'd like to order a large pepperoni pizza.
I'm sorry sir, this is not Pizza Hut.
What?
I didn't say pizza, I said Visa.
Oh. So this is Visa Hut?
I suppose you could say that.
So I can't get any pizza?
No sir, I'm sorry.
What about spaghetti?
Spaghetti? Sir, are you very hungry?
Well, yes, it's almost lunchtime, and I was out snowshoeing all morning. That's hard work, and I really worked up an appetite.
Well, sir, if you let us help you lower your interest rates, you'll have more money for food!
Now that's just plain silly. I never pay interest on my pizza when I buy it from Pizza Hut.
Okay, you have a nice day, sir.
Click.
Buzz...
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