ADVICE: The Wall

Discussion related to the topic ADVICE: The Wall

Forum : 2007 - 2008 Anthology : ADVICE: The Wall

Josiah T.
Posted at: Mar 8, 2008 at 5:05 AM 
Ok, I've edited this a bit with some suggestions that Doug sent me, now I'm wondering if anyone else has any suggestions. :-)

The Wall - Part I

The Wall - Part II

Douglas
Posted at: Mar 8, 2008 at 6:38 AM 
Every time I've read this, I get snagged on this sentence: "The man continued to build until he began to run low on supplies". I don't think there's anything grammatically wrong with it, but for some reason I want it to read simply: "The man continued to build until he ran low on supplies" *shrugs* it's probably just me...

Josiah T.
Posted at: Mar 8, 2008 at 7:39 AM 
haha... I was kind of in a weird mood when I wrote these, I used way more words than I usually do, and probably needed too...

Douglas
Posted at: Mar 8, 2008 at 10:22 AM 
When I'm writing, lots of times I'll go back and re-read something a day or two later and keep saying to myself: "Why in the world did I use all those words to say that simple thing?" :D

Josiah T.
Posted at: Mar 8, 2008 at 12:22 PM 
lol. Sounds about right. :-)

Katie
Posted at: Mar 8, 2008 at 1:16 PM 
Hehe. Yep, I've been there. :-)
Forum : 2007 - 2008 Anthology : ADVICE: The Wall

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